


with fate hanging in the balance

by Lilaciliraya



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Dilaudid, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Injury, Past Drug Addiction, Relapsing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-07
Updated: 2016-12-07
Packaged: 2018-09-07 04:10:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8782420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilaciliraya/pseuds/Lilaciliraya
Summary: It would be so damn easy, is the thing. (or the shortest little passage ever about reid and drugs and the aftermath of season 9)





	

It would be so damn easy, is the thing. The drugs are right there, they have his name on them, they’re completely legal. Nobody would fault him for taking his pills and he would be pain free, riding a high that brings a peace he’s long forgotten. 

 

But then the hard part always was stopping. And if he took these pills there’d be no stopping him from going into the bottom of his bookshelf, opening up his hollow copy of the bible, pulling out Tobias’s dilaudid, and shooting up just for the sake of getting high. He knows he wouldn’t be strong enough to resist, if he let it get that far. 

 

But his back hurts, damn it, and he doesn’t deserve to suffer this much for saving Alex. The bullet to the neck had caused trauma to his spine, and simply supporting his own weight was agony. His doctor had prescribed him dilaudid. Dilaudid, of course, because the universe loved to test him. He has to go to work, so he needs to be able to function, and the only way that is going to happen is if he takes his prescription. 

 

He’s made it through so much worse without narcotics, but he doesn’t want the team to know he’s more seriously injured than he let on. He already almost died, they don’t need to worry any more. He’s not weak, he’s not. He can handle it, once the pain has dulled a bit. It’s just for now, just one dose. He won’t spiral. 

 

So he opens the bottle and swallows his first dose of the drug in years without thinking, the weight of his NA coin burning against his thigh, tears buried somewhere hidden in his eyes. He grabs his messenger bag and heads to work.


End file.
